Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Economic crisis...

I wanted to fill you in on some information I heard today...
To avoid bankruptcy, it seems that a lot of companies are going to be merging. Here are some of the mergers that are already said to be taking place:
  1. Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W.R. Grace Co. may be merging to become "Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace."

  2. PolyGram Records, Warner Bros., and Nabisco Crackers may join forces to become "Poly, Warner, Cracker."

  3. Zippo, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will be merging to form "ZipAudiDoDa."

  4. Knott's Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women (NOW) appear to be merging to "Knott NOW."

  5. Fed Ex may merge with it's biggest competitor, UPS, to become "FedUP."

Ok, just a little corny humor. I'm sure you're all thinking one of two things. Either, "Hahahahahaha..." or, "Clay, you're an idiot."


Funny story...

A politician died and was met by St. Peter. Peter said, "I was told to offer you something you are very familiar with. You will be allowed to vote for where you will spend eternity - heaven or hell. You will spend a day in each place and then cast your vote." The politician took the elevator down and arrived in hell. As the doors opened, Satan met him with a warm handshake. Many politicians who had gone before him were there and greeted him. It was a place of incredible beauty and happiness. No one worked, yet everyone had an abundance. Everyone enjoyed whatever relationship they chose. Everyone lived by their own rules and were outrageously happy. It was everything he had worked toward all of his political life. At the end of the day, he hated having to leave. He took the elevator up and met St. Peter again. He said to Peter, "I would guess that in heaven I would have to live by God's rules - his 'thou shalts' and 'thou shalt nots.' Therefore, I've seen enough! I've made up my mind. I vote for hell." He entered the elevator again and pushed the down button. As the doors opened in hell, his eyes took in absolute devastation aand ruin. People were starving and fighting everywhere. Satan approached him with a broad smile. The politician asked, "What happened?" Satan responded, "Yesterday we were compaigning, today we have your vote."

Haha! Funny, huh? The weird thing is that I've always wanted to get involved in politics at some point in my life. Let me clarify...I want to be in politics - I don't want to be a politician.


Saturday, November 22, 2008

Buryin, marryin, and bangin on the roof...

Thursday was a little crazy for me. I did a funeral at 10am here in Midwest City, then drove to Ft. Gibson for the graveside service at 2pm. Ft. Gibson is about a 2 hour drive. I have to say the Ft. Gibson National Cemetary is amazingly beautiful. It's set up much like the Arlington in Washington DC, only on a much smaller scale.

After the graveside service, I hurried home so I could grab a quick bite to eat and change into a different suit. I had a wedding at the state capitol at 7pm. By the time it was all said and done, I got home at about 9 and was exhausted. It was one of those days that, in ministry, doesn't happen very often. I'm sure they're aren't a whole lot of people who have done a funeral and wedding in the same day, but who knows. What can I say other than...that's why they pay me the big bucks. Actually, I was more than pleased just to have the opportunity to help a few families out.

We've also had some bangin on the roof the last couple of days. Wednesday afternoon I was startled when I was sitting in the living room...the house suddenly began shaking violently due to something hitting our roof. It was the roofing company delivering bundles and bundles and bundles of shingles and shingles and...ok, you get it. The roofers started on our roof Thursday afternoon and were finished by around 4 on Friday. Racism and stereotypes aside, those Mexicans REALLY are hard workers and very good at what they do. The roof looks pretty good.

And, we finished up Friday night by going to the Thunder game. I'm pretty sure the Carl Alber girls could beat them. It's pretty sad. Oh well, I don't think I need to say anything else. I'm sure I've said enough.

That's my world the last few days...


Sunday, November 16, 2008

And so it begins...

Well, the holiday season has officially begun for Vanessa and I. We just returned from Clinton, OK, where we spent the evening with Vanessa's mom's side of the family. Since Vanessa's grandparents (on her mom's side) are divorced and both remarried, we always meet with her grandfather and his wife before Thanksgiving weekend to make sure that we get to see him and her grandmother for the holidays. (Christmas is much the same.)

Our remaining plans for Thanksgiving go something like this...Thanksgiving day we begin by having lunch with my family. We never really do anything with my dad's side, so we do lunch each year with my mom's side of the family. It's nothing unusual for us to have 30 or more together for lunch. Immediately after lunch, we'll drive to Hinton, OK to be with Vanessa's mom's side of the family at her grandmother's house. We'll spend the rest of Thanksgiving Day there with her family. Then I go hunting on Friday (whoo hoo!). Saturday we'll travel to Marlow, OK to have lunch with Vanessa's dad's side of the family. Hopefully, OU will beat Texas Tech next week, then they'll be playing OSU the Saturday after Thanksgiving in the evening, so we can leave Marlow and get home in time to watch Bedlam.

It's crazy how much travelling we do for the holidays, but it's worth it. It's not very often that either of us get to see all of our family. I know a lot of people have to rotate years, spending holidays with one side one year and the other side the next. While it does make for a lot of travel in a short amount of time, we really are fortunate that both of our families are close, so we get to spend time with both sides each holiday.

I'm sure many of you share in this busy-ness. I know one thing...we'll be worn out when it's all said and done. But, I'm sure this will help to make the holidays rush by, and, before we know it, we'll be holding our baby boy!


Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Where are you Barack?

I never thought I'd say anything like this, but this is really what I'm thinking. There is nothing on TV except football and basketball, and I don't like it. Now, I would normally be thrilled to have the option of watching football OR basketball, but not right now. No, I am enduring a great let-down. At this time about a week ago, I found myself being driven insane by the non-stop, on-going discussions about the presidential election - now...I'm lonely without it. If this was such a monumental and historical election, why aren't we hearing anything about it anymore? Will it return to front-page media when Obama is sworn in and actually takes over as president? Hmmm....

Anyway, I don't like hearing about nothing but politics, but I miss it. Ok, I know that makes no sense whatever so I'll shut up.

I'm now realizing that this was one of those blog posts consisting of the ramblings of my mind and nothing that is truly worth writing or reading...I'm sorry you wasted 30 seconds of your life reading it.


Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Voter fraud...

I have to let you know up front, I've got election day blues...and I don't want to change my complaint free bracelet, so I will keep this as polite and courteous as possible.

I don't understand why people are willing to vote for a candidate just because he says he'll bring "change." Hey, if change is what you want, well then you're gonna get it. America got change when the democrats took over congress in '05. Say what you want about George Bush, but, until then, our country's economy wasn't falling faster than Usain Bolt running the 100M. And don't take this the wrong way, because I'm not racist, but what would people say if I told them I voted for John McCain just because he's white. Hmmm...this country bleeds with hypocrisy.

And to top it all off, if people don't vote for Obama just because he's black, then they're voting because he wants to "spread the wealth." I'm sorry, but that's not America - that's socialism. Take from the rich, give to the poor...bite me. It's more like steal from those who have worked their butts off (otherwise known as Americans) and give to the ones too lazy to work, expecting everyone else to take care of them (otherwise known as worthless citizens, undeserving of living in this great nation).

Yes, I do believe Obama is a decent man, a great speaker, and a great leader. But, that doesn't mean he's qualified to be president. Just wanted to get that off my chest.

***I'm sure some people will disagree with me, and that's fine. But if you want to gripe about my opinion then at least have the decency to state who you are, instead of that sissy "anonymous" junk.


Monday, November 3, 2008

Vote now...

No, I'm not talking about the presidential election...you better be planning to do that already anyway. Everyone vote on my blog poll - when will Vanessa have our baby? There will be more polls to come.